It has become patently obvious that the French and the Mohammedans who also happen to live in France cannot live peaceably together. Obviously, what is required is a two state solution – that is to say that after all the necessary UN sponsored negotiations, that the currently existing political unit in which these two warring peoples live should be divided into two countries, one to be called ‘NewFrance’ and the other ‘Gaulistan’.
It might also be useful if the two new countries shared a capital city, perhaps Paris, but failing that then the city of Reims should be handed over to the Mohammedans to use as their capital. Such a gift would obviously be seen by them as both a peace offering and an apology for all the insults levelled by ignorant Frenchmen against the innocent Mohammedans. The French could make this apology complete by converting the Cathedral at Reims into a mosque before handing the city over, which would ensure that good relations between the two new countries would be assured from the outset.
In the general spirit of amity that would then prevail, NewFrance could cement its good relations with Gaulistan by sending all the Jews that currently live in the two countries to Israel. If that turns out to be too expensive, or not acceptable to Gaulistan for some other reason, then camps could be set up in some out of the way place in NewFrance where Jews could be ‘encouraged’ to settle and perform some useful and rewarding work whilst their future is negotiated and settled. This would, naturally, solve the problem of anti-Semitism in both of the new countries and would, obviously, by placing them out of harms way (and away from the mean prying eyes of the nasty right-wing press), be a kindness to the Jews, also.
Really, it’s such a sensible solution when one thinks about it that I have no doubt that President Obama, Prime Minister David Cameron and President Hollande will fall upon this idea with tears of gratitude and whoops of joy.
Okay, but what about the French settlements in Paris full of Christian extremists? The Muslims are convinced that ever since the Battle of Tours, the Christians have stolen their land. I just don't see an easy solution short of resettling the French in Quebec.