Revival: Memorials and the Gate to the Human Heart

by Thomas J. Scheff (August 2010)

It is our sorrow. Shall it melt? Then water
Would gush, flush, green these mountains and these valleys,
And we rebuild our cities, not dream of islands.

When I was a child growing up in the South, I found religious services boring. But I once sneaked into a tent revival meeting. People were laughing, crying, shaking, dancing, and rolling around on the floor. I was delighted because I had never seen anything like it, especially not in my own family. Like many families, we seemed to have a no-emotion rule.
I think that like most of us, my father hid his heart behind a mask of social acceptable faces that covered over his deep feelings. Perhaps public rituals, like the revival tent and war memorials, and even private rituals can help us unveil the best and truest parts of ourselves.

A War Memorial

For the last six years I have been helping at an Iraq War Memorial that my group, Veterans for Peace, sets up on the beach on Sundays. We install what looks like a cemetery, now 3000 crosses, in the morning and remove it in the evening, as per city ordinance. The pier is heavily traveled on Sundays, mostly by tourists. What happens between us vets and some of the visitors who stop is like a little revival meeting.

Hidden Emotions and War
Prayer for Peace rather than War: Let me know my own emotions.
I want to cry bitter tears for the loved ones I have lost, and for the immense loss and destruction that has been going on in the world.

So that I will be less reckless, let me feel fear for the danger and death that we all face.

I often feel weak, helpless, inadequate, or humiliated. Let me feel shame or embarrassment instead of ignoring them or hiding them behind anger and resentment.

Help me to express my anger verbally, rather than suppressing it or acting it out, and encourage others to do the same.

Help me to tolerate authentic expressions of emotion in my family and workplace, rather than continuing the suppression of feeling.

Public monuments like the Vietnam and Arlington West memorials are just a beginning.
Perhaps we could create everyday rituals in our families, offices, schools and churches so that we sleepers can awake.
(I am indebted to Julie Scheff for her helpful suggestions.)
here.

here.

If you have enjoyed this article and want to read more by Thomas J. Scheff, please click here.